Soaring away from you, answers, I need to find,
The reason, I must uncover, amid eternal lies.
Was I wrong?
Have I wandered too far away from home, and reason
you wanted to instill into me?
Have I betrayed, the true cause of your love?
Lost forever, the pain in your eyes for me.
Will I remember the smile etched on your face?
Mirroring the one on mine, drinking from the depths of my mind.
I have traveled, for so very long, growing weaker every second, but richer.
Come into me, show me the way to your side again.
Don’t count the mistakes I made, but return to me,
For this life no longer means anything to me.
The sound of perseverance, blurring, I seek on.
Death, should take me now, if ever, and sweetly hurt me.
In search of reason, I travel.
I Love you. And always will.
But Am I allowed to? Can sinners too love?
Cast a shadow of death, and draw me in your web,
Purify me, defile me.
Kiss me with your cold lip, show me the true meaning of your love.
Unlock my haze, clear my vision, and carry my shadow.
Weak and on my knees, the search futile, death, coiling in, I weep.
I see you, smiling in the mist, looking at me.
And in your smile, I see your love, that I could never see before.
But have I wandered too far away from home?
Lost Innocence
The sound that never came, became, the lullaby of the night.
I waited, for hours that night. The song was never heard again.
Satiating my obsession, in perfect paroxysm of fear,
I lay crouched, hidden from your sight, only to glance upon death.
You will never return to this place.
I will never see you again.
Morning rise, fathoms the undeniable.
I glance out to the gorge.
In Darkness fading, like the pain in your voice,
As you disappear into the fog.
You will never return to this place.
I will never see you again.
The light that never came, substantiates my hunger,
Contemplating, the meaning of your song, my life.
Diminishing, the innocent provocations that used to haunt,
I lay crouched, hidden from your sight, veiled in a blanket of mist.
The last echo of thy lips, I try to keep hidden forever.
Hidden beneath my skin, hidden beneath the scar you left.
Buried under, my dreams ridden with pain,
But over the hollow void, where hope lives.
Will you ever come back?
Will I ever see you Again?
A ray among the dark mist and drizzle.
A breeze, among the scent of dead roses.
It’s a well twisted fascination.
The fascination of death.
Embrace
Death dances, as the light drowns to a drop,
The voices of the crying children, heard over the mist.
Waiting for someone, they fall one by one.
The moon casts down, on the frozen night,
A shadow, over every one of them, blinding.
Unable to see, they still wait, for that someone to arrive.
Lost souls, like fireflies, circle the woods,
In a bid to wander away from this pestilence.
Through the open window, I hear them sing.
Within the fog, I see their shadows moving.
Into the dark, I focus my gaze,
Unable to see, yet I look on.
They stumble and call out, yet patiently wait.
In the mist, they walk on, through the frozen lake.
Answering the call of the wild.
A sad, and lonely call.
It tears me open, yet I cannot help them.
I cannot reach out to them yet.
As the mist clears, they will see me.
They will either embrace me with smiling faces,
Or cry out for their mothers.
But I, am their only hope.
I dance, as the lights drown to a drop,
The voices of the crying children silenced, in the mist.
Waiting for me, they fall one by one.
A diseased mind, a diseased body, and urges of fatal needs.
Define a soul long lost of emotions.
Impurity senses numbed. Salivating through the centuries.
Sense of guilt, flooding over every sane thought,
Decaying blood flowing, poisoning through the misery.
Necropolis of wounded heresy,
The silent water open, reflects, my inner disease.
The open wounds still fresh, stench of a long lost love.
Behold…..blood turns purple!
Thy lips, as they lock onto mine, suck out the emptiness,
From which I feed.
Memories freeze, cataleptic delusions. You reek of putridity.
Unknown to me, it will be passed on,
Offspring with the same un answering disease.
And they in turn, will pass it on.
Your Face, My face. It looks the same.
As delusions of extreme gore take over.
Deeds of the flesh no longer satisfy the ever growing urge to mutilate.
Decaying corpses, aborted fetus they all call upon,
Your necrophobic fantasies of hate.
Leprosy, bodies melting away.
Disfiguring the dying, dissecting through the living.
Fear.Obsession.
Every night, for three years, have I had the same recurring nightmare.
Ardent rain drizzling, the night, darkest.
Renewing atmosphere, the tale continued. For three whole years.
Often it would take a new turn, and I would find myself staring,
Face first, into a wall, crimsoned, with blood.
Then, the clock would strike the end, and I would be made to witness,
Her crucifixion.
Endless. It would go on and on. Her cries as the nails drove deep, as they
Undressed her further.
Nerves being split and flesh being torn.
Serenaded, before they branded her, with a red iron cast.
Expressionless, her face had become. As expressionless as mine.
Eroticism for the few gathered. They sang and danced away.
Never did they once look at her dissolving body, being burned by their torches.
After this account, as they molested her into the night,
Needless to say, they turned to me next.
Desperate, I cried out, as they closed in.
Under the blood red moon, they surrounded me, danced in circles.
Nevertheless, I looked out.
Everyone was dressed in white. All except me...and the half dead girl.
Xorn.Anger.Thats all I could feed off them. They were angry.
Playing the music beside, alone in the cornfield, was a girl clad in red.
Lustful eyes of hers trodded onto mine.
Apathising, with what I was about to endure.
I Looked hard at her.
No. I did not know her. Never had I seen something so delicate.
Emerging out of her eyes, I could see a hint of a falling tear.
Dark, as the sky, her eyes stared onto mine. Me, oblivious, kept looking on.
I knew what she was trying to say, although she kept a distance.
Half naked, I could see her bare breasts, contrast against the deep red cuts.
And then, she advanced away from me. Away into the night.
Vile feelings crossed my mind. I could not control them.
Everything around me lay forgotten, as I was left in a state of putridity.
Senses numbed, Paralyzing pleasure, a hypnotic urgency.
Everything was blurred. All I could feel, see and smell was her.
Even though she disappeared, I lay fantasized, spent.
Nurturing, the lust to remain forever, as it ceased to exist.
The scene changed.
Home.
Everything was the same.
My feelings returned to normal, and I could breathe again.
This perpetual dream, forces me to live.
Helps me stay awake.
Every morning, I find a small cob of corn, reminiscent, of my demonic lover.
You could call me crazy. I myself, think I am.
Are they real? Those people, that cornfield?
Reality lines blur with that of the unexplained.
Ethereal answers lay hidden to me.
Realization sparks a hint. The one clad in red is you.
Everything you do, reminds me of her and vice versa.
Alone spent in eternal bliss, I return to reality every morning,
Lone, to fight the day, another dream.
Devoid, or with you beside me, I do not know when I am dreaming, and when I am awake.
Eternally caught in the web of this remorseless cycle, I am forced to live. I cannot die.
As they would take me away.
Take me away to that cornfield. Away into that night.
Hours and hours pass me by, as I try to purify myself, rid myself, of the disease.
Obsessive devotion
The eyes of the northern star,
Faces, the unknown valley, perched under the silent mountains.
On misty nights, u could hear the lone calls.
Yes, they still pertain. They still drift out.
The stillness only disturbed by the faint whisper of an approaching gale.
The silent night, a purity to behold.
The moon in all its crescent glory, shined upon the dark waters.
The silent water, the giver of life, the perpetuated equity,
The balance of the harvest..
The leaves too, did their bidding.
They rustled ever so softly, ever so faint,
As if, they intentionally did not want to disturb the harmony.
Yes, the harmony. The night was ever so balanced.
The cold, the frost, the endless wind,
The nocturnal birds, the trees, the arriving fall.
The splendid patterns among the emptiest of faces.
The melancholic rhythms of the falling waters.
The song, of her lonely lips……
Hence was the night when I first met her.
On the valley of eternal stillness, there she was.
Standing, in the mist.
Singing a ballad of unspoken love and lost faith.
Clad in moonlight, wrapped in a veil of water,
Her face glowed like the reflected light emerging from the dew below.
I waited, as I could not move.
I could all but shift my gaze away.
The nocturnal birds all perched on her, as they listened to her serenade.
The moment, seemed like eternity.
Beyond death, beyond surreality, beyond suffering.
Beyond anything emotions could pertain,
Beyond, anything ever known to exist.
Disgraced was the word pleasure, during this moment of bliss.
Her eyes swallowed up every bit of the falling moonlight.
She gleamed like a thousand fires burning down the sun,
Her hair was a marinated brown, with a scent of a fallen jasmine upon a bed of pearls.
Her serenade lasted merely a few moments.
Echoing through the hills, it seemed to bring the gorge to life,
Light up the darkest of nights,
And bring salvation upon the dying.,
It seemed to wander and continue along the cycle of isolation,
Conjure life from the dead and decayed.
The winds roared, the creek babbled.
The waves, started to gather and rise.
The moonlight, overcast, silenced and confined by the clouding thunder!
Death, it seemed, was aware of rejuvenating life,
and wanted to end the process of renewal.
The waves lashed over her,
Silencing her song, killing the very breath of disillusioned hope,
The trees slashed, the rain, symbolic of hate, poured down upon me.
Then, she began to fade away.
As suttle, and slowly as she had come.
Her lullaby, disappearing into the very dimensions of silence,
That it had once emerged from,
Gave way to the only sound of bleeding rain.
I shouted, screamed through the night.
I tried but could not move, tried but failed to denounce.
I tried, yet fail to stop her from dissolving into the night.
I cried.
That was the last I saw of her.
I did, go back into the valley of frozen memories,
The valley, of haunting stillness.
But not ever, was I able to see the face I so longed for.
Now when I sit still, and look down upon the gorge,
Sometimes, right before morning rise, I hear her song.
Still as pure and gentle.
And they lock me back into that night.
Reminiscent of what I met for only a mere moment,
But fell so deeply in love with.
