The Immortal Pass

Death,from a distance away,
has forgone, the immortal pass.
Its blade of wrath, unconquerable,
A dominion of winding fatality.

Death plays games, of hide and seek,
of flame, admist a cry!
The child of hope, no longer lives,
as Death came winding by.

I have chosen the late,
the same song upon, my lips draw blood,
from her veins so queer,so ravenous,
that it has shed ,a stream of lies.

Chosen death over life,
envied, through the agony,
bore the child, in disharmony.
Eternal lies, as my voice was heard.
One last time. Yet, it still echoes.
undisturbed, through time.

ClOUds OF wAR

A kIllER stOrm wiNs,

a FragmEnteD viCtorY, swEarinG thUnder StrucK

I haVE kIlled Thy soUL, uPOn mY knEE,

aND hAve deStroYEd, thUnderstrucK.

WitH it cOme tO inVErt, oUTsidE shIne tOnighT,

CroWned bY lEviaThan, bLood oF vibRation frEEing inSiDe.

See More fIeld Of vEnom stRikeIng thE vein,

cLoudIn' Voice?

anNihilate the Pain.

BlAze oF sPlenDour, sUmmoning gRim,

ThE vEnoM of GhoUls, fORcin' Still,

I aM thE maSTer sInneRr,

sNOw oF lYmpH,

deFEndiNg, all tThaTS EthEral,

I'LL fOrgIve yOur Sins.

A Lover's End

I cannot see, and I fail to hear,

the ballad of thy love,

As true love, has vanished from thy soul,

Like a withered, purple despair.

I lived for thee once upon a time,

I lived on silence, and your infinite face.

On Light, so bliss, it charmed once did,

So bright, among the haze.

My love's death was trajic,

although ,once, it was proof,

Once it was made of blood,

for your essence, was once true.

With its end, I came to see,

on my immortal prison abode,

Death spurns life, it sets you free,

upon the mystic road.

Your beauty lives on,

burning bright,

lighted mystic tree,

yet, you live like never before,

though unloved, by me.

Hope leaves

I feel distant from reality, everything to me is at times a big movement, people pass me by,without registering,meaningless..... A movement of everything that just keeps moving, and motions within the things that are moving are triggers to the emotions which it presents, so I tend to make things more intense, or bring out things that you may not see, or do extreme expressions so I can feel what Im bringing out, because sometimes I feel as if I connect to another world that consists nothing of this world, as in beyond emotions, and physical existence,beyond pain, and beyond love,beyond betrayal and beyond Redemption. I think its nirvana, and when I connect , I intensify it by the things that I do. I connect ,so deeply that I find myself not feeling a part of this world as me,but a thousand frequencies,one, with nothing but everything.........lost within the realms of reality and Psychosis...,the divide vanishing.......Again.....this might sound Hypocritic to you guys, but its what I feel within......and to anyone who knows me,its transparent.

MiNd GaMEs

Beat down, to a crimson hue,

Broken, to the core,

Logic defies my state of mind,

A poisoned blood, no more.

I longed for thee, a million times,

I longed, for sacrifice.

I longed for years, forever now,

I longed ,

for paradise.

Never meant to be,

upon my soul,

A scar, it deeply bled.....

A love lost now, forever gone,

Forever, laid to rest.

I scream out loud, in my sleep...

I scream, to keep you safe.

The journey upon a painted night,

upon, a painted hate.

I Miss You.

Her Melodic Death

A blood harvest.

The moon weeping above,

Underneath sickness , and a melodic death.

I found my way,

how, i'll never know for sure,

into the realms of the darker side of life.

Enchanted, I felt the colors of death.

Into the mind of a stranger,

i found myself.

hidden away, in the corner.

Subdued, disassociated.

Surreality , and a diseased mind.

Lost, once again in the cycle of incessant numbness,

lost, to the world of conflict,the world of perdition,

I prayed, like never before, for deliverance.

For a second chance to rid the disease,

to avoid, damnation.

Eternal circle of suffering,

bodies, melting away.

I could never find my way out of the cycle.

Somewhere buried within,

the song of the cursed took over me.

and I have been singing, ever since.

the song of the diseased,

the song, of the damned.

the forsaken ones, beside me,

as the fire burned us away,

till death, licked us over, and the drapery,

fell upon.

Bliss

A silver moon adorned,

the empty night sky,

a lonely leaf shed,

flew down, and hit the ground.

The fall, had arrived.

The breeze spoke of, a long lost cause

where urges, had bled through scars,

and dreams sketched into the skin.

But, like the winter snow, on a bright summer day,

it had long, been forgotten.

The same note kept comming back,

my hands, all throbbed and shook...

the pain erupted within my mind,

a drop, dripped onto the floor.

The last thing I remembered,

was the faint scent of her hair.

it drifted me off to sleep.

while the blade shimmered, with the purest of blood,

I smiled, in the darkness.

For the first time, I knew ecstacy.

A momentary pleasure.

Followed undeterred, by

bliss, death, and silence.

Bleed to Feel


A chain of burdens, coiled around me,
I lay down, to the cold.
Insensitive numbness and a fleeing spree,
A rush of blood..Paralysing..Decaying.
My significance, on hold.


The pain within was not to give.
I had nowhere else to go.
No other way to live,
My friend, had turned to foe.


Who said I didn’t believe in her??
Who looked up my soul??
Who tried and found a way to live,
To love her to the core??


I slash my wrists…..I slash it all.
I cut my vein of mud.
The stream of lies, a colorless hue,
My focus shifts,
the blood.


A blade, a swipe of a silver knife
It drips onto the floor..
I drink tonight, to ease the fight,
I drink my blood,
once more.

The Broken Song


In Joy, in health,
A deceptive heart in love.
The defection is permanent,
It was not ever, meant to be real


Infatuation?
A notion to bend time?
A lust of life?
Or was it true, faithful, and pure?


Intimate in love,
Words, went unspoken.
A regretful life, where
Hearts are meant to be broken.


Why did you go away?
A senseless heresy?
A Blank arrow of betrayal,
Was it never, meant to be?


A million deals apart,
A minute seems like years,
A million miles away,
A million shed of tears.

Fuck You

NATASHA

Her life was bleak.

She had wept all night,

Weak and sprawled,

From her lonely fight.

She had been tortured,

She had been betrayed.

Violated, she has dripped blood,

from the scars,

that do not seem to fade.

She's Just a girl,

A flower, in the pond.

Everyday, to her, is a fight,

to break up her illusions, her heavy bonds.

She has been forced to love,

and forced to hate.

Forced to live, her lonely fate.

She lives alone, her head held high

Pretending it's over.

But, why did it have to be her?

Why did she have numbered days?

She trods on knowing-not,

With a painted smile, upon her face.

The struggler gives up.....

loses all hope.

She has been punished,

yet,

she cries no more.

The Photograph

The photograph, a still imprint, a memory captured,

Hung on the empty east-end wall.

A recollection it triggers, it anchors to,

her eyes, before the fall.

It hangs there forever.....forever to be true,

A possession so priced, I cannot afford to lose.

Yet, it lies there down trodden,

as the seasons come and go,

But the memory it provides,

haunt me no more.

I know I am afraid of change,

Afraid, of the final fall.

Afraid of the photograph,

upon the east-end wall.

A WINTER DREAM

A hope arrives, translucent,

But Its a dark road ahead.

A lonely Way, along the morbid weep

the Last Summer, long dead.

The fall triggers emotionally,

the seasons change anew.

The woods swallow the spirits up,

of the mocking birds who flew.

When it gets to winter,

when the snow will all but set,

I'll erase my world forever,

A sacrifice, a bait.

As sparks of me dissolve,

Into an all knowing Future Realm,

Not an empty prommise,but ,

It's My Winter Dream.

The diabolic sweep

When alone,frustrated,and lost,

I found peace in prayer.

But all those times have passed,

Now GOD dosen't even care.

the Subliminal verses, The evil leap,

Guides me now, the diabolical sweep.

Empty darkness,Lustful guilt,

Greed of Flesh, Orgasmic heals.

Jelousy runs,a vein of mud,

A drink of lifeline, a drop of blood.

A entity of pain,of death and hate,

A stuck up soul , And sex for bait.

An Earthbound existence, An undead beast,

A seductive lover, a fleshy feast

The Lone survivor, and now I weep,

But am lost forever, to the diabolical sweep.

The Poison Tree

All alone,so insecure,
I don't Know what to feel,
Broken down, by these elusive bounds,
I bend down,upon my knees.

As I fall from grace,distorted,
I wake up to the dark,
I lie alone,forgotten,
like a drowning-ocean arc.

The sun comes out,the drops of light,
But all it is to me, another bout,another fight.
I fight alone,face covered,struggling to be free,
From my life,
my life, a poison tree.

A New Page Begins................

Silence.Not a sound for miles.Not even an echo.Only the faint,rhythmic calls of the uncountable, hidden insects and birds scattered somewhere,among the pine forest.It was around 6 P.M.,but the sky was particularly dark.Well not dark as in midnight dark,but a faint,purple haze,the effect highlighted by the dense approaching mist.

The location is a dense forest called 'lolay',158 KM from the southernmost border of china,the nearest town,a massive 126 KM away(Gangtok).Lulled by the welcomming chirps of the inforestine birds returning to their nests,I had decided to slip out for a walk along a narrow,broken,half-tarred road through a dense network of pine and other evergreen trees.Although the natural sounds,which were getting louder by the minute,were very symphonyc and soothing,I decided to put on my earphones and play some soft,thought-invoking, music.Not a soul in sight.The mist was too much to see beyond a few feet around and , the cold wa biting.(it must have been a bit over 5 degrees).I spotted a low rock, under a huge,huge, pine and decided to sit down for a while.After the customary checks for leaches,which this place was famous for,I sat down.Although beautiful,the setting was immensely depressing.For some time,I was lost in my thoughts...........everything else had stopped registering.'Hope Leaves' by Opeth added to the complacency.Many thoughts crossed my mind.......mostly questions,without answers.Many,questioned my faith and some, shook all that I stood for,and believed in.

'Why do people,have to meet,love, and then hurt?'; 'Why does GOD not forsee the future,and procreate a happy ending for us all,so as to restore our faith in him?'; 'Am I too young to think about all this?'; 'Why can't I be more like Sanil or Mathew,who,live their lives enjoying every moment,positively?'; 'Why do I have to be so expressive and negative, all the time?'; 'Why the fuck do I write all this stuff down?'; 'What do I want to prove to people? That I am hurting inside?Broken,dismantled and lost at 16'?

All this cross my mind........enstrengthened by the gloomy whether.It had started to drizzle.Then I realize..........that there are no answers to these questions......there never will be.Maybe this is what I liked about her......her attempts to simplify all these complex thoughts and put them up for me.Maybe.I'll never know for sure.I shuffle through the songs, and play 'Eden' by the Mayfield Four........One of the most inspiring,and dedicative songs ever made(according to me).It re-affirms my faith and re-establishes my love for music,poetry and for life on the whole.I start on my way back to the forest cottage,where we would be halting for the night.A lonely walk.But nothing, compared to the Journey that I am waiting to begin.......the journey of life,afresh.But now I am filled with hope.Hope for a better me,a stronger me.A friend once said "If there isn't a happy ending, its not the end at all".

"So then,turn the page and say goodbye and walk away

from everything,

That we worked so hard to save"

Player One^

The Distant Fade

A distant fade lights up my mind,

sparks a comeback,a renumeration.

A scent,a tune or even a name,

anchors to deprivity,to fall, again..

Gone are my days of pestilence,

Gone are the tides of pain..

But when the fall arrives to me,

they flow back,Insane..

I have found new ways,a brand new start..

But the music still plays, and the memories still hurt.

One October Night

Time and time again all I seem to Come up with is all these depressing stuff.......about Death,Illusions,Pain and seperation........so I have decided to write this one, about Hope,Light, and love. This poem is gonna come in two parts,with this ,being the first.....

One October Night (Part 1)

The night was nearing its end,

feeding on earnest,so dark.

Silence, the mum was everywhere

Alone,I had to walk.

The cold was biting, and it was hard to see

The path I had taken,of grief ,and misery.

Then it came,a distant fade....

a song so sweet,of blinding faith.

A spark of hope,a ray of light,

illuminating,that chilly october night.

Undefined

Now that the chains are broken,

and the tide has gone to shore,

the ocean in its depth's,

dosen't call out my name anymore.

The white light is upon me,

it'll take me away from this world.

To Another place to dream,

to love and then, fall.

Grateful was I when it happened.

too grateful, to see.....

That what I left behind was you,

you,..........my destiny.

A Longing

If I were a bird,
With you I would fly,
Guide you away for eternity,
Away to paradise.

If I were a free spirit,
With you I would roam,
Watch over you all night and day,
and shield you from the cold.

But, I know I am none of these,
I am just me alone,
Just another one who loved you,
And dreamt of somewhat more…..

I know I am not what I long to be,
And sometimes, I just pretend.
For in my life, all that matters to me,
Is your love, till the end.

Stars

On the broken wings of an eagle,
My love for you flies.
Soaring higher and higher,
And touching the deep-blue skies.

I want to reach up above,
And pull down a star from the sky.
To place it within,
Your crystal-dreamy eye.

To dwell there forever,
As my love for you.
On the wings of consistent time
Forever- enduring, and true.

The Final Fall Fall

Alone in this silenced world,
This ocean of endless pain,
I am left alone to find my way
Through the storming rain.

All alone I was meant to be,
And all alone I shall remain.
But all I want to do is hide,
And pass my life away.

Time can heal and only time will tell,
Fill up your scars, and lift up your gaze
It’ll build you back, and make you love again
As I fall,
to my , final grave.

One More Time

I am now immune,
To the pain I once felt,
Immune to the eternal heartbreak
That for months, had kept me awake.

I am now stronger,
Strong enough to lie,
To myself and those around me,
That you were just another no-one,
In my life.

All these days have passed by,
Each moment, put me through hell.
But all that has made me stronger,
To come back, and love you again.

My Angel

Gazing into her blue eyes when we first met,
I knew that she was heaven sent.
She was all I ever dreamed of,
An angel from above.

Like the moon, stars and the morning sunrise,
Like the dew on a red-stained rose, at night,
She was all I ever dreamed of,
An angel from above.

Like twilight on a rainy day, with tender-love and a misty face,
She’s all that I’ll ever need.
My life will pass and so will my creed.
Yet,
She is the one I’ll always dream of,
My angel, from above.

MY PSYCHOTICS

In my dreams,
I see that distant figure,
Yet that familiar smile……..
Which haunts me all day through,
And keeps me awake at night.

I try to hide away from it,
Comfort myself with lies.
I try to walk away from it,
Hoping, praying,
That everything would pass by.

In my dreams,
I hear that voice,
Which inspires yet makes me cry,
Which destroys and then, comforts me,
Granting me no choice.

I am taken away from reality,
My dreams all crushed and gone.
I am guided towards insanity,
Alone I am left to mourn.

Was that really you?
Or just the delirious me?
Was that really your voice,
That had once, set me free?

Time and time this happens……
Time and time again I bleed,
Time and time again I am lost,
To,
My psychotics.

My Psychotics pt-2

Open upon my morning light,

the sun was not so real.....

open upon the grave of lies,

the rain was like my tears....

This wasn't how it always was,

Once............,I had a dream.....

Once I had a chance to live,

to love and forgive.

Incipitness and my incarious soul,

which was once, set free......

is now chained, pound and moribound...

and there's no one but me.

chained,my time,lost,paramore....

parasites feeding on me......

I am bleeding......and will bleed, forevermore,

till u set me free...............

Here I am.........at a cross road in life........where I have to choose my Destiny, where I have to prioritize........where I have to make "those" decisions,which will decide the outcome of my life.........or "mY EaRtHBoUnD eXiSTence" as I like to call it.
When I decided to start this blog, it was supposed to be a medium to publicise my music (if you call it that!) and was supposed to be called "AcOusTiks".......but,as i started typing,Just felt that there was a deeper meaning to life than only music or poetry.So, this blog is gonna be the medium through which I share my views on life.......poetically and lyrically.....

WELCOME to "mY EaRtHBoUnD eXiSTence"!!